It's like making love with a gorilla; you don't stop until the gorilla stops.  

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  They have a right to work wherever they want to -- as long as they have dinner ready when you get home.  

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  I never drink water -- that's the stuff that rusts pipes.  

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  If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.  

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  I never let my schooling interfere with my education.  

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  If only I had a little humility I would be perfect.  

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  Violence is not the key, but who needs a key when you can kick the door in?  

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  Hearts will never be made practical until they are made unbreakable  

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  It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not.  

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  Ever wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?  

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  I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's the best they're gonna feel all day.  

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  In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on.  

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  Animated avatars make Baby Jesus cry...  

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  biggs.. you need to stay as far away from web cams as possible :P  

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  In Europe we throw our midgets for sport. The Game is really simple; who ever can throw their midget the furthest wins. You Americans should adopt this sport.  

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  mmm...Tauntaun  

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  GOD DAMMIT BRAD!!! QUIT POSTING SHIT WHEN I WALK AWAY FROM THE COMPUTER, ASSHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!  

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  Noooo! not the asses and titties!  

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  Boobs have been the cause of most of mankind's greatest endeavors.  

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  If any guy I know ever has bigger boobs than I do, I'm gonna be pissed.  

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  People say that beer is only a temporary solution, but life is only a temporary condition....  

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  It's like my grandma always said...why buy the cow, when you can get the sex for free?  

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  unless your mom's my sister I am not an inbreeder  

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  Whale penis... too large... ARGGG!!! THE PAIN!  

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  Steve, I have a little voodoo doll with your name on it.  

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